Dark Mood (from Blurty)
Joey Michaels on November 30th, 2002I get into some pretty dark moods sometimes. Usually, I try to fight them off with jokes or sleep or cleaning. Lately, though, I am having panic attacks, which I have never had before. I think about my finances, or my relationship, and feel tightness in my chest. My breath gets short. I feel like I can’t move.
Afterwards, I can’t just laugh it off. I have been trying, but I just can’t find humor in it. I don’t usually get like this around the holidays. Well, actually, I don’t usually get like this ever.
Years ago, I was an angry young man. I would get worked up into a fury. Once or twice, I got so mad that I blacked out. Walked around in a daze. However, I would let it all out, either by bitching to my friends or breaking stuff or melting crayons to make these melted crayon sculptures or something. I know I am the local king of repressed emotions, so I suppose this has something to do with it. Meh.
